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Devalued and Discarded.
I am the rejected parent.
I am losing my children
and I don’t know how to stop it.
WHAT IS PARENTAL ALIENATION?
![What is Parent Alienation?](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/PL_SadWomanHandOnWindow_1080x1137-1080x675.jpg)
What is Parent Alienation?
Parental alienation takes place when a child aligns himself or herself to one parent and rejects a loving relationship with the other parent. The rejection does not have any justification. It is a campaign of denigration against a parent with no valid reasoning. ...
![Examples of Parent Alienation](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/HandOnTatteredRedWindow540x360.jpg)
Examples of Parent Alienation
Frequent, Manipulative Communication. There were recordings on my youngest son’s phone. Recordings of our conversations. I was tipped off by a message from James (dad) to him saying, “Make sure you tape record all your conversations with her.” I also found James...
![The Marriage](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/BW_ShatteredWindow_1080x720-1080x675.jpg)
The Marriage
People often ask me why I married the man I did. The answer to that is simple. We were the Perfect Storm. You will have to read my book to find the answers, but I will share some of my thoughts here. I was much younger than him. At the time we met, I had just...
![The Separation](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/BW_WomanOnStairsDistant_1080x722-1080x675.jpg)
The Separation
The days following the separation were terrible. Looking back, so much damage was done. My boys were immediately directly being told by James that, “you can’t have a relationship with both your parents,” and “you must pick one parent over another.” ...
![The Courts](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/jordan-whitt-145327-unsplash-1080x675.jpg)
The Courts
Finally a small victory: The court orders that I start counseling with Sam immediately and that all fees be paid by James. I was told I could pick any counselor I wanted. I went to the psychiatrist we were working with and asked him to recommend someone for me. He...
![No Contact Orders](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/YoungManLookingAway.jpg)
No Contact Orders
It seems that the no-contact orders and the time apart between Sam and his father only fueled James’s fire. James had a lot of time to think… and apparently, send emails. Since James is now realizing that he can’t remove Sam completely from my life, he started...
![My Middle Son](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/MomSonSiloSunset_Landscape-1080x675.jpg)
My Middle Son
All three boys have handled this differently. I am going to start with my middle son, Johnny, because this is my main focus and main source of sadness and anguish. I used to rock this child to sleep while rubbing his forehead and singing, “You are my sunshine.” ...
![My Youngest Son](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/SonEyeBW_Landscape.jpg)
My Youngest Son
We were so close. SO VERY CLOSE. I can’t find words to describe the drastic change in our relationship. The only saving grace I have – that I cling to – is that a therapist told me kids have their foundation built by the time they are ten. The therapist keeps telling...
![Surviving Parent Alienation](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/gaelle-marcel-189753-unsplash-1080x675.jpg)
Surviving Parent Alienation
How do I handle Parent Alienation? Not well! I can’t even begin to describe the pain and sense of loss I go through daily. I ache for my kids. I miss everything about being a mom. I even miss doing their laundry! I was a stay-at-home mom for 16+ years and I was a...
![Rock Bottom](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/adult-alone-black-and-white-551588-1080x675.jpg)
Rock Bottom
Again I have to talk about the “New Normal”. What my life used to be, and what it is now. I have to keep re-adjusting and lowering my expectations. The lack of a role I play in my boy’s lives saddens me. I want to stop this cancer that grows everyday inside this...
![Sam Turns 18](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/04/black-and-white-boy-man-48017-1080x675.jpg)
Sam Turns 18
My biggest fear has come true. After 4 years of listening to Sam threaten to block me and cut all ties with me once he turned 18 has come true. A few days before his 18th birthday it all went silent. Since I can’t go to his dad’s house in fear of having the police...
![Feeling Broken Inside](https://theyusedtocallmemom.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/FeelingBroken_NoTrespassing-1080x675.jpg)
Feeling Broken Inside
Even though Sam is now 18 and I have been blocked on all forms of communication since his birthday in August, I continue to follow his school progress online. About once a week I write him a short letter and tell him how much I miss him and love him. I usually print...